Are you a Self-Saboteur?
Do you ask yourself questions like,
“Why do I keep doing this?” “Why do bad things keep happening to me?”
Self-Sabotage is the most defeating practice to our success. We all have experienced it in one way or another.
Do you find yourself:
Blaming others when things go wrong
Walking away when things are hard
Picking fights with people
Dating people you know are not “good” for you
Not stating your needs
Putting yourself down
Comfort eating or emotional eating
Struggling with perfectionism
Comparing yourself to others
Burning yourself out
Making decisions for other people in your life rather than letting them decide for themselves
This is my short list. If you answered “yes” to any of these, listen up because I have tips to help you change this.
Tips to Overcoming Self-Sabotage
1. Identify what is happening.
Look for patterns. What is the specific behavior you are trying to change?
For example, if you notice that you quit jobs before your annual review -- why? Are you afraid of feedback? This is the hard one, so make sure you are doing this in a kind way. Don’t start this when you are in a bad mood, lacking in sleep, hungry, etc. KINDNESS IS THE KEY HERE. 2. What’s your trigger?
You may already know what they are or maybe you don’t. Time to start paying attention. Triggers could be boredom, doing too well, fear, self-doubt, anxiety, too busy, relationships, environments, etc. Track them – don’t judge them. They are what they are and now that you know what they are you can look for them and do something different. 3. Talk about it!
Secrecy is the biggest promoter of self-sabotage. Talk to your people, therapist, mindset coach, or really, anyone who you can trust. It helps them know how to support you and gives you the extra accountability. It’s a win-win. 4. Know when to get additional help.
You may need to call in a professional. Yep, that’s me. I say this because sometimes we need a little extra push or cannot figure out what is getting in the way. Email, call or text me if this is the case for you.